by Hope Mucklow, Author Blogger, Coach, and Teacher

Anyone who follows my writing and/or presence know that I am an advocate for people, young and old, rich or poor, educated and non, little and big, black, white or somewhere in between. This means there is a major anti-bullying theme that runs through my work. This is why I view endorsed or state approved curriculum as one of the tools that the ruling elite uses to bully those they subdue.

Curriculum in the modern school setting has become the main means to reign in the classroom teacher from creatively implementing their gifts to motivate, encourage, and led their students to learn. Ask any good caring teacher. There’s no time for them to incorporate an engaging lesson they or their colleagues designed. Rather their calendar is overruled by the micro managing administration that is more concerned about raising standardized test scores to give the school better ratings for funding.

Shifting to homeschool, it’s the main question that homeschooling moms hurl at each other at church, the park, and co-op, “What curriculum do you use?” They have even taught the kids to ask this of each other. Then they judge each other and make their alliances based on the answers.

So what is curriculum and why is it important? Curriculum is like a road map or a guide with content that should include resources and means to achieve certain learning objectives. A world view or rather predominate philosophy on the approach to the content will run through its contents and resources. This is where culture and religion (which are very much entwined) comes in. This came up in dialog on social media yesterday.

A teacher had posted about the importance of getting together with other people to do anything and everything. I agreed to point, but went on to admonish her to encourage her lonely students that not all is lost when they are socially isolated.

I asked her to consider pointing her lonely pupils to a great historical figure, St. Patrick, in how he used his isolation as a kidnapped Britton teen taken to work as a slave in Ireland to develop his personal character. Her reply was, “I cannot bring religion into the classroom.” My heart sank because this woman is supposed to be a Bible believing Christian who is actively involved in holding the county school board accountable for their politically correct decisions at the cost of students/parents personal liberties.

But, looking back at myself at her age and situation, I didn’t know any differently either. For the 1958 Communist Agenda for the United States of America goals (see link below) were accomplished many years ago. I was born and educated into much of it as well.

Goal #17 states, “Get control of the schools. Use them as transmission belts for socialism and current Communist propaganda. Soften the curriculum. Get control of teachers’ associations. Put the party line in text-books.”

Clearly atheism is the religion and humanism is the philosophy behind all public and unfortunately much of the modern private schooling systems, even the religious ones. This too was one of the goals. # 27 states, “Infiltrate the churches and replace revealed religion with ‘social religion.’ Discredit the Bible and emphasize the need for intellectual maturity which does not need a ‘religious crutch.'”

I too was that well intended public school teacher in the early 1990’s and then again in the early 2000’s who thought I would be an awesome teacher if students didn’t know where I stood on evolution even though the statistics I ran for a whole semester at WVU proved that it is as impossible if not more so than believing in creation by a higher being. After all, that professor gave quite a lecture at the last class that we dare not question evolution even in light of the statistics. But let’s get back to the point about curriculum and its purposes.

Viewing curriculum as a maps can be very helpful and useful. Just keep in mind that there are those who pave the way and those who follow.

Now keep in mind it is an awful lot of work to be the first person to plow through a wild forest to clear a path. For any who hike or cross-country ski there is much to be enjoyed following the tracks of someone who did the hard work to trudge through first. Then there are are also those who need help finding the way if they don’t know the terrain. Lastly, the path can be over trodden, ruined from erosion, or just not be the destination anymore. All of these metaphorically transfer to my points about academic curriculum.

If you choose to homeschool your child/children you need to honestly asses what you know and that which you do not. You also need to account for what you can and cannot afford with your time and money.

A comprehensive curriculum will sure make your life easier at first, but give it time and a smart child will bore with it and sometimes rebel from it. This is why some have found the option of unschooling to be of help to them. They ditch curriculum and release their child/children to explore and learn for themselves. I have found that this too has a time and place, but agree with C.S.Lewis’s point in The Abolition of Man that children need to be guided and taught what to think early on. The toddler will not share his/her toys with another without being taught to take turns.

Circling back, viewing curriculum as a tool, utensils have a time and place. Some are better than others. The master of any art never uses just one. They assess the situation and choose the best instrument needed to accomplish the goal. That is why I never purchased any one curriculum in a box for my daughter to learn from as a homeschooled student or completely unschooled her.

Instead, I paid a little bit more to buy certain parts of curriculums from Abeka, Apologia, and Bob Jones. Then I gave thanks for a friend giving me Saxon Math 5/6 and another for giving me the Teaching Textbooks Pre-Algebra courses. I then purchased at full price The Complete Algebra and The Complete Geometry Courses written by Tom Clark who has since become a major part of our homeschool experience. Some courses especially in high school work better with an established curriculum.

Lastly beware that some teachers, schools, and administrations whether they be average, not well educated themselves, tired, lazy, or underfunded rely too heavily on their chosen curriculum. The curriculum dictates and overrides inquisitive thoughtful children who are able to think beyond a prescribed lesson. This is why I pulled my daughter from a well respected private Christian school and resumed homeschooling when she was in 6th grade while we lived in Alabama.

So in summary, don’t allow anyone to academically bully you or your child with curriculum. It should serve you and your child not the other way around. Have a good school year. Sincerely, hopetheparentteacher.

*No advertising or promotional fees were received from any company, person, or product mentioned in the blog.

**Here’s a blog on wildflowers that exemplifies what teachers are no longer allowed to do and what students are missing out on because of it.

Turn to the Wildflowers to Lessen Your Anxiety

#Homeschool #Curriculum #blendedlearning #edpolicy #parentpower #learning #schoolreform #unschooling #microschool

St. Patrick’s Day

https://www.ethanallen.org/45_communist_goals_from_58_years_ago

https://davidbartonblog.typepad.com/blog/2010/04/early-american-educationby-david-barton.html

https://davidbartonblog.typepad.com/blog/2010/04/early-american-educationby-david-barton.html

by Hope Mucklow, Author, Teacher, Blogger, and Coach

It started with my teen wanting to go to the local Barbie Premier. Not only did she want to go, she wanted to buy a pink dress and a blond wig. Thankfully, it was just a wig and not hair dye. Even better she wised up financially and gave that up. But she did succeed in the whole shopping endeavor. What’s a parent to do?

Option #1: Adamantly oppose which could create rebellion. See the blog listed below: Does every teen need to rebel?

Option #2: Let her be her and go do whatever she wants with her friends. After all we can’t control them forever and this is essentially what the peer pressure at school, society, and the Barbie movie is all about.

Option #3: Go with her and discuss the movie’s strengths and weaknesses following.

Of course I chose #3 deluding myself that I’m wonder mommy. (See blog on that.) The week started out well. Time at the ever so posh Boca Raton Mall turned out to be an amazing Mother/Daughter Day Out. (For those of you who know me, this is a big deal. I h-a-t-e shopping especially the malls. But the Boca Mall is a bit more tolerable for me with its sky light windows.)

Anyway, Nordstrom’s just started their Anniversary Sale so I took her. There was one perfect pink dress in her size on sale. And Grandma’s check for her birthday covered it and some needed undergarments to allow this dress to lay properly.

Now we had coordinated the week prior with a friend from the youth group and the wonderful female youth leader to join us for the movie and purchased the tickets. But then I saw Krista’s post:

Oh no, now what? Like I didn’t expect this with what Hollywood has produced over the years? Good grief, hadn’t I contemplated what Mattel’s Barbie had done to me as a child growing up in the 1970’s? This doll didn’t empower me at all, Rather it was the tool another child used during play to introduce me to stripping, being sexy, and going to bed with Ken much less the unrealistic plastic body image.

Funny how we’ve been told that Ruth Handler created Barbie as an alternative to baby dolls and to be a roll model to girls that “they can be whoever they want to be.” While some of this may sound great, it is not at all Biblical or mentally healthy. Yup, I’m going to claim its bad for mental health. Why? How?

First of all, people canNOT always become who they want to. Accepting what a person can and cannot do is essential to having a healthy relatively happy mental outlook. Life is full of unhappy individuals who don’t make enough money, are overlooked for promotions, denied access to xyz and/or have physical situations that prohibit. Limitations are part of the human experience that the scientific revolution, atheism, and feminism deny. Uptonian lies like these are one of the reasons why mental health illnesses are on the rise and fortitude is lacking.

The next problem with the Barbie Movie messages is the wisest literature of the world teach the virtues of courage, temperance, and prudence in collaborative cooperation to one another. When one practices courage without prudent self-regulation one usually engages in foolish risks and endeavors that often lead to disasters and life altering consequences, especially mentally.

For the not so big risk takers lack of modesty leads to disrespect of one’s body and incites further disrespect from others. The same is can be said for lack of self-control. All of this leads to poor life relating experiences that contribute to low self-esteem, anxiety, and/or depression.

Now the recent Barbie Movie and its fans are going to rush to blame the men Ken’s of the world. This is what the immature do. Yup. Name calling has a place and it’s time to do it. Those who blame others for their insecurities, weaknesses, and poor choices are usually immature. There are times when someone has been completely disrespected, violated, and a true victim, but the majority of the lingo on this topic in our culture is the former.

Watch me contradict myself now. The impressionable children are victims of entertainment like this. How are young girls going to treat boys at school after watching this movie? How are they going to treat their brothers?

Oh and Barbie resists Ken’s kiss in the movie, how great right? If only Hollywood was teaching sexual self-control here, but they’re not. Rather they are working to condemn sex and make us all compliant sexless robots. Consider the new genre of totalitarian novels that has emerged since the 19th Century Scientific Revolution specifically Orwell’s 1984. Sex is basically forbidden and allowed only to procreate once a year. Larry Arnn, President of Hillsdale College articulates this precisely in the December 2020 publication of Imprimis (see below for the link).

Rapping up, parents, teachers, and youth leaders, it’s not just as easy as the three choices I started this blog out with. It’s not so “black and white.” While Option #3 may seem ideal, even this choice only works if you are a good role model and have cultivated a good relationship with the child/teen. So start with yourself. Heal those childhood and adult emotional wounds that fester and trigger easily. Be honest with your kids when you inappropriately lose it or make a poor choice. Stop the blame game. Take responsibility, be real, and embrace the realities of life. Stop being rigid and plastic yourself.

Lastly, check out Krista Kafer’s and Sharen Close Peterson’s further writing on this movie. I’m indebted to their inside connections, viewing, and comments as well as our wonderful youth director Mackenzie at Crossbridge Church who wound up taking the girls without me.

Does every teen need to rebel?

Wonder Mommy

The Folly of “Don’t Be a Prude”

https://imprimis.hillsdale.edu/orwells-1984-today/

#Barbiemovie #TheBarbieMovie #Hollywoodinfluence #culturalimpacts #parenting

How the context of TV and home life affect learning

Public, Private, or Homeschool the Answer

Part 1 of this series focuses on the honest limitations of each schooling option with the conclusion that parents have been equipped by natural law to make this decision based on their personal situation and the learning needs of their child was discussed. This blog, Part 2, focuses on history of the public school.

First, one needs to look historically how all of the various schooling options came into existence in the United States of America. Up until the 1830’s parents were responsible not the state for educating their children.

Because of that how one child was taught compared to another varied extensively. Some went to church supported schools. Others to boarding schools. Many home schooled or hired private tutors. A few communities rallied together to organize a local school. Some teachers traveled from town to town to deliver services. Last and certainly not least there were work apprenticeships.

“In the early years of the nation, schooling was haphazard. Many children were excluded on the basis of income, race or ethnicity, gender, geographic location, and other reasons.” -Center of Education Policy, The Graduate School of Education & Human Development at George Washington University

This statement from GW sounds very modern to me. However the rational for public schools differed. Continuing with the information from GW:

“A strong dose of moral instruction would also be provided to instill civic virtues. Educating children of the poor and middle classes would prepare them to obtain good jobs, proponents argued, and there by strengthen the nation’s economic position. In addition to preparing students for citizenship and work, education was seen by some reformers as a means for people to achieve happiness and fulfillment.” Sounds like a sales pitch to convince the parents and communities into buying this concept of trusting the government to educate their children through this new idea of public school.

“Common school advocates emphasized the knowledge, civic, and economic benefits of public schooling. Common schools would teach the ‘three R’s’ (reading, writing, arithmetic), along with other subjects such as history, geography, grammar, and rhetoric.”

This is where the Three R’s came from. I never understood this given that only one of the core subjects, reading started with R. What a poor way to teach reading and spelling if this is the catch phrase for public education! It’s already confusing enough for students to differentiate between write and rite! Then it is just sloppy speaking to claim that R in arithmetic. But there you have it. The very founding of public school is not making it simple, logical, and straightforward for students to learn. So what is it they are doing?

Now, let’s look at one of its early founders, Horace Mann. Why is it, a man who chiefly taught himself such a proponent of universal public education? What was his motive?

Motive is difficult to judge. This is why certain court cases are judged by a jury of 12 people instead of the judge him/herself. In the situations where someone commits murder and then suicide, the emotional pain for the family is there is no closure as to what motivated the person to commit such horrible crime.

Back to what public school used to look like before Horace Mann became it’s greatest reformer in the 19th century. As I read over the list of 8 very different ways families schooled their children in GW’s article reference below in the End notes, it appears that in 2023 especially in the state of Florida that this is where education is headed again. Microschools, tutors, homeschool, and the like are the new “old” way of he future.

End notes

https://files.eric.ed.gov/fulltext/ED606970.pdf

https://files.eric.ed.gov/fulltext/ED606970.pdf

https://www.biography.com/scholars-educators/horace-mann

https://archive.org/details/45-declared-goals

https://plato.stanford.edu/entries/natural-law-theories/

https://illinoisfamily.org/education/how-horace-mann-worked-to-destroy-traditional-education-and-america/

How Horace Mann Worked to Destroy Traditional Education—and America

“Life is pain. Anyone who tells you otherwise is trying to sell you something. ” -Wesley from The Princess Bride

21st century westerners need to remind themselves of this life truth as the marketing spin doctors bombard them 24/7 through their phones, culture and governments with promises of safety and a pain free life if only we buy this product or subscribe to this service. No one likes when a business deal goes badly so certifications are the cure, right? Probably not.

Education whether it be formal with a silver spoon, hard knocks in the street, or somewhere in between has been the case for sometime. Rather public funded education run by the government is actually one of the newer practices as a result of the Enlightenment. What’s even newer is government sanctioned certifications with the blessings of a ruling body who claims the expert rights to endow such certifications in given fields.

My first experience with this was through the Red Cross’s CPR, First Aid, and Lifesaving classes. Achieving these certifications was key for me to secure the coveted teen job of life guard. It enabled Peter me to hire me to teach swimming lessons at the local YMCA even though the Lifesaving class had nothing to do with teaching anyone how to swim. That had to come with on the job training watching and following my mentor.

I keep all the certifications up with CPR being the most annoying requiring updates every year. Later in the 1990’s emerged the Lifeguarding class who’s swimming requirements weeded out many who passed the Red Cross’s Lifesaving course. But then there weren’t enough who could pass so they dropped the requirements. Then the real question was who was swimming every day practicing the skills? They have the certificate, they don’t have to prove anything anymore do they? These are the questions that surround whether certification is a good idea or needed at all.

Talk to any good caring professional these days. Certification is NOT proof of quality training and execution thereof. It’s become a money making racket for government sanctioned organizations to decide who’s allowed in the profession and who’s not.

It’s produced an interesting conundrum. For the fields that we know well we understand what a joke certification and licensing has become, but then we are conditioned to look for sheepskins and push our children to pursue them. Don’t misunderstand me, I advocate and model life long learning if only certification and licensing rewarded this, but they don’t. Rather they might hinder it. They only accept what classes that are approved by them. They don’t take into consideration what really matters. They insult instead by wasting your time and demanding your money. I had to wait for an hour on the phone yesterday to speak to a representative on which form I should complete to re-activate my Florida State Professional Teacher’s Certificate. Then I am treated like a criminal who’s guilty and has to prove my innocence by submitting fingerprints yet again and paying $90.75 to do so.

I’ve come to view this all as academic and professional bullying. So what do you do? Of course you have to work within the system, but choose carefully who you hire and why. Most importantly don’t allow yourself or your children to be bullied that they have to be schooled by certified teachers.

Teacher certification is what really opened my eyes to the hypocrisy. I remember taking the National Teacher’s Certification Test at West Virginia University in 1990. The test did not really assess my understanding of biology, but it did test my political correctness. In fact, I recall feeling absolutely unprepared especially when it came to the vast array of scientific equipment, laboratory procedures, and assessment thereof. It wasn’t until I had worked for several years in the pharmaceutical industry by walking the hallways of prestigious medical school, studied in their libraries, and engaged in discussions with professors of medicine at journal clubs and at the national medical meetings that I actually found some understanding that produce enough confidence in the world of biology and medicine.

Ironically this amazing academic medical experience was completely dismissed when I stepped back into the public classroom to teach middle school science. My pay level was reduced to credit only the half-day long term substitute teaching I had done in the early 1990’s. However, they managed to re-active a dormant teaching certificate provided I jumped through a few more of their hoops.

Being a bit naïve to how political certification really is, I challenged myself to work towards National Board Teacher Certification. I made note of all the requirements, worked very hard on my own, but skipped the “optional” Saturday morning “training” classes because I wasn’t going to leave my baby at home without me any more than I already did all week long to teach full time. I’m pretty sure that’s why I never passed. The final test was 4 essay questions. One I knocked out of the ball bark, two I answered well enough, and the last I completely bombed. Funny my score for all 4 was exactly the same, but added up low enough to ensure that I couldn’t easily try again. Now I could have paid another $125 to repeal and request that my test be graded again, but who needs to shell out more money to be rejected for not showing up for Saturday morning brainwashing?

These are the truths behind teacher certification. It’s been criticized by those in the know from the start. Education like science has always been full of politics, arguing, and debate. Yet it is what is held over parents and their children’s heads. States like Florida may allow parents to homeschool their children, but in order to do so they require an annual assessment to continue to be conducted by a Florida Certified Teacher.

If there is anything I’ve learned homeschooling my daughter for the past eight years is that the best trained teacher doesn’t guarantee a child will learn. The desire to understand is personal and comes from within. Each has a choice to be a fool or to learn to be wise. It’s every parents battle to persuade their children to listen, but ultimately each child is responsible for their decisions. The majority of the book of Proverbs addresses this very issue.

But we live in a culture that values otherwise. I wrote earlier about my observation as a classroom teacher that it was always my fault, never the students depending on the administrator’s goal. It’s funny how the buck stops somewhere, but usually isn’t really at the feet of the one responsible.

To make matters worse in regards to education, the public school model is designed to pull children away from their parents and to orient towards their peers instead. I just finished reading Hold On to Your Kids: Why Parents Need to Matter More than Peers by Gordon Neufeld, Ph.D. and Gabor Mate, M.D. According to their work sending children out to be approved by their peers thwarts their ability to develop and contributes to life long immaturity. I’ve also heard it produces a propensity to life long peer pressure.

Nature gives parents the responsibility to raise their children. Ancient cultures and civilizations fill history with proof of this. But after World War II, industrialized countries were seduced to defer this position to “experts.” Who is an expert and why?

Another lesson I’ve learned through homeschooling my child is that I need to clean up my own bad public education even as a certified teacher in 5 different states. Rolling up my sleeves to learn along side my daughter has posed its challenges, but it has also brought the greatest joy and satisfaction.

Don’t allow others to intimidate you any further and especially your kids. Decide what you can and want to do with them and do it. Selectively hire out tutors and coaches as you need. Don’t let the state or the “experts” raise your kids and determine your or their worth. Look for qualified not just certified people to assist you in your life’s journey.

For more provocative thought: https://fee.org/articles/the-origins-of-the-public-school/

https://www.notablebiographies.com/Ba-Be/Barton-Clara.html

#Certification #parenting #education #schooling #homeschooling #publiceducation

It happened again today. I felt the temptation to play Wonder Mommy. My daughter knew what happens when I attempt to take on the part and immediately supported the decision to choose less for we all know what happens when a mere mortal buys the lie and believes that they can do more than they can…disaster.

How do you respond? Do you scream, curse, yell, cry, hit, or blame others when the spinning plates in the juggling act come crashing down?

Why is it that we are so easily seduced into being that which we never can be?

If one considers the classic story of the fall of humans as described in Genesis Chapter 3 the serpent seduced Eve with the power that she could know good from evil on her own without having to rely on God, her Creator telling her what she could and couldn’t do. The fruit as food wasn’t the primary issue. Rather it was the vessel of much deeper issues and questions like, “Did God really say?” “Could, should He be solely trusted?” ” Don’t I know what’s best for me?” To be created like God poses the temptation to want to be god.

Moving onto Genesis Chapter 4 we have a choice just like the first two sons, Cain and Abel as to who we are going to listen to. Abel chose to submit to God and live according to his rule, but Cain thought he knew better and choose his own efforts instead. Ironically, Abel died and Cain lived on. In fact, Cain initiated the first of what has become known as civilization, but a new son, Seth is who was needed to create a lineage from where the Messiah Savior would come.

These classic stories from ancient Hebrew literature apply to each of us even in post modern western culture. I reiterate what I wrote in a blog last September. We keep thinking we can play god. This rugged individualism, pull yourself up by the bootstraps, and DIY (Do It Yourself) American values are only setting people up for unrealistic expectations of self and others.

We are not gods. But too many people especially women happily volunteer and try to be it. Think about it. Every year a day is set aside to gather around and call your mother blessed. Books, gifts, cards, and other paraphernalia adorn slogans on how great mothers are and how they forever hold our hearts. Now, don’t get me wrong, I like the Epilogue of Proverbs 31: The Wife of Noble Character but, if there is anything I’ve taught my daughter it is that I am not her perfect mother nor should I be. She has a perfect Heavenly Father, her Creator to parent her flawlessly instead.

But there is a major problem, many have been mislead, blame, and do not know who this perfect Heavenly Father is. They are angry and have exchanged His role for people led organizations whether it is the family, local church, school, or government. All of these organizations have their time and place, but cannot ever be perfect much less meet all of your needs.

For me, the answer lies in getting the roles straight. Let God be God and we his dependent creatures. A few challenges arise in this process. One is finding out who the God of the Holy Bible really is. He is not some cosmic kill joy, power hungry ogre, or distant clock maker. Nor is He an easy pushover who loves and accepts every ridiculous and childish attitude, belief, and behavior.

Jesus dished out harsh words for the religious leaders of the day who misrepresented YHWY time and time again. In addition they lorded their power over the little people. Reflecting back on the passage in Genesis chapter 2, to question the real character of God is one of the key strategies used to pull people away from enjoying a reliant relationship with our Creator.

Notice also a few chapters further back in Genesis 1:27 that man, male and female were created in God’s image. A reflection in the mirror or photo on social media captures some of the features of the real identity, but it’s not the same. Sharing the image of God should not be confused with being god, yet, it is time and time again.

Parenting and teaching our children is one of the greatest opportunities to be like God. Personally, I think that YHWY uses fatherly language in order to redeem those hurt by their earthly fathers. Wisdom in the book of Proverbs is described by feminine pronouns. Wisdom is God too. Jesus who was very much a man embodied wisdom. Stop letting your bad experience with a certain parent or gender give you the excuse to continue in ignorance as to who the real true living God really is.

It is your responsibility “to seek the LORD while He may be found.” Clean up your wrong impression of who He is. Repent from rebelling against His rule and laws. Pursue loving the LORD your God with all your heart soul, strength, and mind. Move onto to a healthier love of self not this self-serving perpetual victim type which is so popular today. A healthy godly love of self will automatically spill over into loving, respecting, and caring for your neighbor.

Stop trying to be that super hero and point your children, family, and friends to their perfect Heavenly Father when you inevitable fail them. Lastly, thank God for when He enables you to pull off something amazing through His power and grace like packing up a house and driving a 26 foot Penske truck out of state. Don’t take the glory yourself.

#Parenting #Mothering

Sign up for classes. Pay the experts. What are the results? What are the guarantees? Parents have yet more burden placed on them when their children aren’t swimming independently.

The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) suggests that children should be in swim lessons until they have achieved at least basic water competency. This means they can get in and out of the water without assistance, “to tread water or hold resting float with the ability to transition into forward movement, to be able to swim 25 yards independently while taking breaths as needed, to have the emotional level to adapt to different water situations, to have the understanding of important water safety rules such as kids always swim with adult supervision, never swim alone and wear life jackets in and around open water” according to the USSSA. (See link below.)

Sound reasonable? Maybe and maybe not. Where do you live? Do you have access to classes? Can you afford them. If you live near Palm Beach Gardens, Florida there is a scholarship program at https://livelikejake.com/scholarship/ but that might not be where you are. Besides are you capable of being the one who teaches your child? That’s how it works in other parts of the world especially places like the Amazon or Pacific Islands.

Western modern culture in industrialized countries like the United States has dethroned parents of their natural role to teach and raise their children. This post industrial high tech culture questions parents and replaces them with “certified” or professional teachers to take their place. Certifications might be something to achieve, but they really don’t guarantee anything. If anything they can create a false sense of superiority in addition to increasing fees. Also certifications often fail to acknowledge experience, talent, and most importantly the character of the individual.

Classes can be great. They have a time and place, but sometimes parents are the best teachers to their own children. Yet, too many moms and dads relegate this natural gift to pay for the local classes that all the other parents are doing. They have been convinced that they are not good enough and that their children need to be around peers to advance. It’s what made schools and peers all the rage since World War II. But what often ensues is peer pressure, bullying, and disrespect of parents.

According to Neufeld and Mate in Hold on to Your Kids when children turn to their peers instead of their parents for identity the results dull the integrative mind, jeopardizes adaptive trial and error learning, attaches them to the wrong mentors, stunts their ability to articulate, makes studies irrelevant, makes them more susceptible to bullying, and impedes their ability to mature. Dropping your child off for peer based classes may not be producing the long-term results your really looking for.

Swimming offers a wonderful fun and relaxing time to bond with your toddler. Don’t farm this out to a stranger if you have access to a pool and the ability to swim well. If you need look for a class for parents and children, an instructor that will give you tips on how you might be able to lead your youngster, or pick up a book at the library. Recommended reading is offered below.

Another cultural trend in the West when it comes to swimming is the false need for more stuff. Parents show up with water wing, floats, rafts, and toys. But upon closer evaluation do all these swimming aid help or hinder your child’s ability to swim?

Type in a search about lifeguards and water wings. You’ll quickly find why we hate them and never put them on our own children. The last rescue I made was at my community pool when a parent who was busily talking allowed his toddler to drift too far away, the wing popped and down the child went. I swam to the child faster than the certified lifeguard on duty. I had heard about the potential of water wings deflating 25 years ago when my lifesaving instructor trained me. Ironically, years after those certifications lapsed is when I actually used the training and saved a child’s life.

The other reasons why water wings are counterproductive is they give a false sense of security while impeding proper body position and arm motion for swimming. Think about my story above. The father was overly confident that his son was fine. Now, I’m sure there are kids out there who were raised with water wings that did go onto learn how to swim, but why make the process harder and more unsafe?

In regards to all the floats, they pop easily, they obstruct viewing, and children can get caught underneath and panic. This is why many community pools outlaw them.

Sure they are fun, but evaluate what the product is, teach your kids so that if they do get caught under it they stay calm, swim out from under, and then come up for air. Teach them not to panic if it deflates. Most importantly, always keep an eye out. Put the phone down. Focus on your child even when they are good swimmers. Drowning does not discriminate. It happens to people of all ages, swimming abilities, and various situations. It only takes a few seconds for inhaled water to lead to damaging and possibly deadly results.

Lastly, every child is different. Don’t place unrealistic expectations on your youngster when they will be able to swim independently. There is no exact formula of how many lessons it takes, what age, or how long. Personality and perception of experience play a role as well. If the child shows displeasure at getting water in their face or during their first immersion experience respect it, validate, comfort immediately with a warm hug then try again later when they show signs that they are ready.

Keep in mind that the more frequently the child is given the opportunity to learn, practice, or play in the pool that will increase the learning. 30 minutes 3-5X/week is going to produce better results than once a week. A week long class while on vacation may do better than 5 lessons over 5 weeks. My advice is start as soon as you are able. Whether it is the bathtub when your baby is 4 weeks old*, in your backyard pool in sunny Florida, or local community pool, don’t wait until they are ready for school. Bond now through the wonderful joy of swimming.

**Beware of cute photos: The adorable dog photos above did come at a cost. She loved swimming so much that it was next to impossible for us to enjoy swimming anymore. She always had to jump in and swim to whoever was in the pool. Those claws didn’t feel good. Dog hair also clogs the filter. We kept the dog, but sold the house. No more pool in the backyard. Thank God my daughter knew how to swim well before we adopted this wonderful black lab rescue.

https://neufeldinstitute.org/resources/hold-on-to-your-kids-book/

https://www.usswimschools.org/about/core-values-purpose/usssa-basic-swimming-definition/

https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/how-to-teach-your-baby-to-swim-douglas-doman/1113942887

*Water Babies: Safe Starts in Swimming by Francoise Barbira Freedman

Learn to Swim: Step by step water confidence and safety skills for babies and young children by Rob &Kathy McKay

Teaching Swimming and Water Safety: Learning Aquatics the Australian Way. The Australian Council for the Teaching of Swimming and water Safety

#Swimminglessons #Parenting #Waterwings

This might be a bit of a stretch to ask what St. Patrick and red pandas have in common, but I love the story behind St. Patrick’s teen life and calling to love the Irish.  My intent in writing Rojo was to give the world a unique (and educational about pandas) story to encourage loving self and others as God created and call us to do. Doesn’t St. Patrick demonstrate this in his forgiveness of the Irish pirates and those who forced him into slavery?  That plus most people know very little accurate information about both.

St. Patrick was Romano British, not Irish. He was kidnapped by Irish Pirates from his noble home in Brittan when he was a teenager and forced into Irish slavery.  He didn’t go by the name Patrick until he trained to be a Catholic Bishop many years later in France.  He returned to Ireland to share God’s love and knowledge with the Irish…the people who at one time kidnapped him. He most likely used the clover to explain God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit. Three distinct roles in the same one God.

Red pandas were named panda first.  Not the Giant panda.  They are not raccoons or foxes. But, rather very cute creatures that can teach us something about God and his creation too.  Check out how in Rojo, The Baby Red Panda at the Zoo by Hope Mucklow. https://www.amazon.com/Rojo-Baby-Red-Panda-Zoo/dp/1620865939/ref=sr_1_1?crid=1G01Y5Z4QV5BS&keywords=Rojo+the+baby+red+panda+at+the+zoo&qid=1647099123&sprefix=rojo+the+baby+red+panda+at+the+zoo%2Caps%2C109&sr=8-1

Read more about St. Patrick in St. Patrick’s Day by Gail Gibbons, Patrick Patron Saint of Ireland by Tomie dePaola, and

https://americanminute.com/blogs/todays-american-minute/saint-patrick-found-ireland-all-heathen-and-left-it-all-christian-american-minute-with-bill-federer?_pos=1&_sid=32379229f&_ss=r

Click here:

to download and print a blank copy of the illustrated coloring sheet.

I awoke thankful for so much this Thanksgiving Day 2021. So many mysteries, hurts, and puzzles in my life have become crystal clear since 2020. Interestingly, my daughter predicted it when interviewed in December 2019 at the 200th Birthday Celebration for Alabama in Montgomery. Somehow she just knew 2020 was not going to be just another year. Being thankful is an important trait, but so is discontent, yes discontent.

When one feels content there is no need to make change much less improvements. Pain and difficulties motivate improvement and new innovations. Making the best of a bad situation is a good psychological way to deal with it, but to accept something that we have the power to change requires the courage and boldness to step out, take a stand, and do something. That last statement was something that sunk into my head one night in 2021

Our move to Alabama met a purpose, but that was short lived. The required lifestyle there was taking a toll on everyone except on the younger dog who got plenty of stimulation chasing squirrels on 2 acres. Country living just doesn’t work in the long run for city people especially for a small family who isn’t from the area. But moving from Central Alabama back to where our hearts kept leading, northern city and Hispanic congested South Florida was going to be very painful with the amount of work it was going to require.

Growing up with a strong value to minimize pain, hard work, and discomfort was the very hurdle I needed to overcome. It was the spark that kept the fire of a former diagnosis of GAD (General Anxiety Disorder) burning. So, I awakened to the reality that I had the choice and the power to do the monumental task that lay ahead. This was the very key to unlock my baseline of unhappiness that I ironically maintained by accepting by being grateful for other things.

How often is it that those of us spiritual types trip over the very secrets that are promised and readily available? Does not the God of the Hebrews of whom Jesus came promise to equip for every calling given? Admitting my folly, confessing it, and turning from it to step out in confident faith is what I am most thankful for.

Beware of the self-help writing especially Christian ones that keep you trapped in circumstances by giving thanks that you ought to change. This advise is the a lie from the pit of hell. Now, by all means being thankful is very important, but one must strive for the balance. Hence the serenity prayer.

Happy Thanksgiving.

#Thanksgiving #Discontent #Contentment #Christianselfhelp

Scrolling through the Face Book group messages this morning, I read a mom’s question soliciting child friendly resources to teach her youngster. I applaud this mother for her sensitivity to her child’s developmental needs. The public schools could sure use some more of this as they have been indoctrinating kindergarten children with inappropriate sex education for a generation now. Then the thought dawned on me, this is the war of the east against the west.

Until September 11, 2001, the United States managed to dodge the 20th century plus warfare on its continental soil. Both World War I and II were fought mostly in Europe. We shipped and flew our young men and women to the war fronts while families in Europe sent their children to less populated country side places for safe refuge while the war raged on. This was the environment that C.S. Lewis wrote the start of the Chronicles of Narnia in.

I have come to the conclusion in generalized thinking (please note that there are a million exceptions) that we in the west are looked upon by our human family members who stayed behind in the various countries of Europe and Asia as the idealized immature siblings who are always chasing fantasies. What I mean is we or which ever relative in the past who came to the United States believed they could make a better life for themselves here. Whether it was the Pilgrims seeking religious freedom, the Irish looking for work, or the families of politically ousted, all are believing that freedom and a better future lies in the United States. This general view of immigration is what built America. This was mostly true, although those pushing a certain idealized current agenda will argue it is not. To which I would reply corruption over the years has slowly eroded the reality that if one was willing to work hard enough, they could create a great life in the U.S.A.

Along with this immature idealization in the west is a belief that we can avoid pain and hardship if only we purchase a certain product, subscribe to a particular service, or vote for a candidate who promises that which they canNOT deliver. Parents, grandparents and especially some romantic mothers are seduced into believing that their precious bundle of joy will be the next great whatever without discipline, hard work, and tears.

Those in the East especially in war torn areas like Syria, Iraq, and Afghanistan see horrible sites on a regular basis. Terror reigns and rules their communities monthly, weekly, and sometimes daily.

Marrying someone from another country taught me a lot during ten years of marriage. The first was a different and better understanding of one of the petitions in the Lord’s Prayer, “Give us this day our daily bread.” Somehow Christians in the west have failed to understand what daily means. They have been led to trust more in doctors, government or corporate jobs, insurance, and retirement packages for security. None of these except doctors existed at the time of the great Jewish Rabbi’s teaching of this prayer. In fact, those doctors were also usually the high priests. It would not be for many more years when the separation of leadership into healthcare, education, politics, and religion would take place.

The Lord’s Prayer

The “Christian West” no longer is. The trust in human made institutions through educational indoctrination and failure to walk the talk has finally displaced the original plan of the founding fathers. (If you disagree with my last claim in the previous sentence I encourage you to read the wall builders resources below.) But allow me to return to the mom looking out for her child’s emotional needs and ability to handle the history about what happen twenty years ago on September 11th.

How we handle our own emotional reaction to horrific news teaches our children more than any book, resource, or counselor. Examples are the best teacher. And what I am about to say may not be what you were expecting. Your initial reaction is not necessarily good or bad, it just is. This is the first step in handling tragedy. We need to stop judging our natural human response and those of others. We need to learn that each may react a little differently. Now when one gives way to panic, that may endanger themselves and others, but it is not necessarily wrong. You can read more about this listed below in my blog regarding a boating accident that my daughter, several others, and myself survived that sent us all into the freezing cold White River of Arkansas.

Instead of adding to the myriad of false emotional expectations by reading another how to book or blog, what I believe is needed is a greater respect and understanding of G_d, self, and others. Since the self-help genre is loaded with the latter, hence the name I will start with it.

Each responds to tragedy differently especially initially. Consider that one person runs out of a fire while another runs into help. This is why I wrote about taking turns processing the pain and inconveniences posed to all early on in 2020. What we need to do is learn how to listen to our own emotions and to the emotions of others. Listen don’t react. Then as you learn about how your response may have negatively impacted others especially your children, talk about it when you are calm. Admit that you may have been reacting in fear of what humans can do to you more so than what G_d can. Jesus taught that we should instead fear G_d instead of humans in Matthew 10:28 referenced below.

The book of Psalms if full of writers who works through their reality that fears and anger regarding injustice overwhelm at first. This is the normal reaction! It is through reflective time in prayer through faith in who G_d is, the great I AM that they process their fear and or grief that enables them to conclude with praise and hope. Psalm 77 is one of the most well known for this. So take time to listen to, reflect upon, and process your own emotions then do so for your friends, family, and especially your children.

https://www.narnia.com/books

https://wallbuilders.com/

https://hopetheparentteacher.com/?p=701

Manners May Be Key to Getting Through Crisis

https://biblehub.com/matthew/10-28.htm

https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Psalm%2077&version=NIV

#NeverForget #911anniversary #traumaresponse